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Are you ready to start budgeting or beginning your own financial journey, but your spouse or your partner is not on board? It can be difficult to get your partner on the same page, financially…but with some love and patience, it is possible. Let’s dive into seven tips for budgeting as a couple so that you can both get on the same financial page with ease. 

Money is Stressful

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It’s no secret that talking about money and finances can be stressful in a relationship. In fact, many couples find themselves fighting about their finances on a daily basis, and sadly, money is one of the top causes of divorce.

If you’re struggling to stop the money fights and are afraid to check your bank account on payday, you’re ready to take a step toward fixing your finances. This also means that you’re ready to start living on a budget and working towards financial freedom.

Are You on the Same Page

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But what happens when your spouse or your partner isn’t ready? It can be difficult to get both of you on the same page at the same time. But it’s difficult to make substantial progress when you’re flying solo and even more difficult when your partner is actually working against you.

8 Tips for Budgeting as a Couple

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Let’s discuss some actionable steps you can take toward finding a financial compromise with your partner. When you can work together on the same team as a couple combining your efforts, you can become an unstoppable financial force!

1. Don’t Nag

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This is hard. This can be really hard. When you’re trying to get your partner to see things your way, it’s normal to want to talk to them about it often. But when your spouse or partner doesn’t see things your way, they may feel as though you’re nagging them, which is likely to push them further away instead of moving them closer to working with you.

You simply have to stop bringing it up constantly; this is super important. Asking them, bringing it up constantly. and initiating casual conversations about money or about your kids is a simple way to start talking about the situation at hand and let the conversation flow naturally.

2. Take the Pressure Off

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Don’t try to force them into thinking the way you’re thinking. You want them to come to this conclusion on their own, not because you’ve forced them to join you in your financial crusade. 

Putting on the pressure to budget as a couple can cause them to resent you and ensure they will dig their heels in and double down on their desire to continue managing finances their way (or not at all).

3. Take Time To Dream Together

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Remember, budgeting isn’t about restriction. Instead, a budget is a tool to help you reach your goals.  Budgeting as a couple can help you achieve financial goals and dreams you never thought possible.

Sit down with your partner and dream together. Focus on their dreams, and ask them what living a debt-free life would look like to them.

4. Set Financial Goals as a Couple

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After your dream sesh, it’s important to work backward and set financial goals as a couple. Tread lightly here as you don’t want to order them and make them feel defeated. Focus on how being able to get out of debt and learning to live on a budget is going to allow you to achieve these financial goals.

Keep in mind it may be necessary to have similar conversations many times over before your partner starts to soften their stance.

5. Find a Financial Plan That Works for You

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When we first began our financial journey, we attended Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University. It was my idea, and I was pumped to go; unfortunately, my husband didn’t share my excitement.

He sat with his arms crossed with a disinterested expression on his face, but over time I could tell the course material was resonating with him.  His body language started to relax, and he even began laughing at Dave’s corny jokes. Remember…like it or not, oftentimes, our partners are resistant to what we want.

Find a Third Party

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Finding a third party (who would be considered an expert) with more clout will likely steer the conversations in a different direction. It doesn’t have to be Dave Ramsey. There are so many incredible budgeting courses available. It’s important to learn from someone whose personality and teaching style resonate with you. 

Here’s the thing, most budgeting systems will work – if you work them.

Consistency is Key

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A system you can stick with consistently. As with all new habits, consistency is key.

In our family, we use our printable budgeting planner to keep us organized and stick to our specific system month after month.  We also use a digital budget spreadsheet, which allows us to make changes quickly and easily and also access our budget from our phones when we’re on the go!

6. Focus on the Good Stuff

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Instead of telling your spouse or partner all of the reasons why you need to budget and pay off debt dripping with negativity, try playing up the positives.

Explain that budgeting is not about being restrictive. Budgeting is not about telling them they can’t ever spend any money; instead, budgeting will actually offer them the freedom to spend guilt-free!

Play up the Positives

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If he loves golf, you can include greens fees in your budget. Showing your partner how starting your financial journey can actually change things for the better may be just what they need to hear to feel comfortable.

Play up the positives, and be sure to offer many examples of how budgeting can actually enrich your life and reduce the constant money stress.

7. Do the Work

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If you’ve completed all the other steps and your partner is still completely against budgeting or paying off debt, then they leave you no choice but to go it alone. You have to. Because you already know in your heart this is what’s best for your financial situation and your family, you have to do it yourself.

Is it going to be slower? Yep. Is it going to be harder? Yeah, it sure is. It will be harder doing it alone…but it’s still possible. It’s still possible to be effective. It’s still possible to live on a budget. It’s still possible to pay off debt.

8. Lead by Example

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If you’re already doing the work, drop the occasional hint. Show your partner how you’re doing it.  Give them specific examples of how it’s working, but remember, try not to nag, and do your best to try not to control their expenses.

Just because you’re the one budgeting doesn’t mean you’re the boss, so try not to act like it. They may not want to be involved, but that doesn’t make you the boss of the relationship. You’re still partners. You’re still equals.

Keep it Positive

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Lead by example, lead with love, give them monthly updates, and let them know about the progress you’re making. And remember, keep it positive. Remind them that you could be doing so much more if they would join you in your financial crusade.  Don’t blame them, and remember to give them grace.

If you remain kind, calm, and consistent in your efforts, I can almost guarantee you that, eventually, they will see the progress you’re making. They will see the potential in your finances and want to join you and work as a team towards financial freedom.

15 Reasons People Feel Like They Never Have Enough Money

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Actively saving and living frugally may lead you to think you’re getting ahead, but when you look at the big picture of where your money is going, the bills, food, and never-ending expenses make it seem like it’ll never be enough. Someone was asking for support online and asked fellow users if anyone else felt like they never had any money? Overwhelmingly, people agreed, so if you’re feeling broke, these people share similar struggles.

How To Create a Monthly Budget You Can Actually Stick to

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Budgets do not need to be scary and overwhelming. Instead, they are really quite simple; it is we who tend to over-complicate them. Follow this simple guide to creating a budget that actually works. How to Create a Simple Monthly Budget You Can Actually Stick to

3 Ways To Budget Your Fluctuating Income

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Do you have an irregular income that makes it difficult to set a monthly budget that works? You know you need a budget, but every time you sit down and try to set one up, you probably get discouraged because of your fluctuating income, right?  Here are three ways to nail budgeting when your income fluctuates. 3 Ways to Create a Budget With an Irregular Income

3 Simple Steps To Balancing Your Budget Each Month

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Living on a budget is crucial when working towards reaching your financial goals but creating and sticking to a personal budget is only half the battle. The act of balancing a budget at the end of each budget period is an essential part of the budgeting process that many people skip. Here are three steps to close out your budget. 3 Simple Steps To Balancing a Budget (and Why it’s Important)

Budget Better in 2023 With a Budget Binder

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Creating a budget is important, but so is having a system to maintain it throughout the month. Setting up a budget binder is a great way to stay on top of your budget and keep yourself organized. How to Budget Better in 2023 With A Printable Budget Binder

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