Most people strive to be the best person they can be. But for some, life circumstances, addictions, or mental health can make this much more difficult. In a recent online poll, people gave their best advice on how to deal with realizing that you have been a terrible person. Here’s what they had to say…
1. Try Better
“Everyone thinks they are a good person until something opens their eyes. Everyone is selfish, and everyone does wrong; it’s just a few who realize it and consistently try to be better,” a person advised.
2. Apologize in the Moment
“Make amends where you can, and do better in the future. It’s all we can do. Indeed, seeking someone to apologize for your own closure is not appropriate. But you can apologize in the moment when you realize your behavior is wrong,” someone suggested.
3. Take Pride
“You can’t change the past, only the future. Form new relationships and do them right. Once you truly become a new person, you can separate who you are from who you were and take pride in the fact you’ve done a very hard thing that few are capable of doing or willing to try,” somebody said.
4. It’s a Good Thing
“Accept that cringing at past behaviors means you’re growing as a person, and that’s a good thing,” someone explained.
5. There’s Still Time
“You stop being a terrible person. The past has passed. Fix yourself while there’s still time, and let what can’t be fixed be,” a person said.
6. Forgive Yourself
Someone expressed, “You have to forgive yourself, find out why you did what you did, and learn what you can do to be better to the people you’ve apologized to and any new people in your life.”
7. Be a Safe Place
“I started apologizing to everyone I knew I’d hurt and doing things every day for other people to make their day/life better. Trying to become the safe person for other people now as an adult I definitely didn’t have and desperately needed as a child and adolescent,” someone suggested.
8. Avoid Hurting People
“I avoid people altogether whenever I can. And only interact when necessary. I quit my office job and switched to a remote work lifestyle to become a hermit and avoid hurting other people’s feelings,” somebody said.
9. Keep Moving Forward
“Focus on being a better person now and in the future. Show kindness and make amends where possible, but remember, self-improvement is a lifelong journey. Keep moving forward,” someone explained.
“I’m a teacher, and one thing that I’ve learned is that when I messed up, the way to apologize is to understand where you’ve been wrong, figure out how you can be better, and do that,” a person advised.
11. Making Amends
“Realize you’re not a terrible person—just a person who did bad things. You are making amends by recognizing it and being better,” someone said.
12. Life Regrets
Someone quoted, “A wise man once said, ‘Healing starts with regretting your life up to the moment of change.’
13. Not Your Choices
“You’ll always be your worst critic. I’m convinced that how I’ve felt about myself my entire life led me to make the decisions I’ve made that made me a “terrible person.” I’ll also say that you are not your choice,” a person explained.
“Definitely therapy. If you’re unsure how to progress with personal development and relationships, a therapist can help guide you,” a person expressed.
15. One Day at a Time
“Start by simply being better today and then keep doing that daily. Eventually, your reputation will catch up to you,” somebody explained.
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Inspired by this thread – photos for illustrative purposes only.