Young woman making an annoyed face

A user on a popular online forum shares their story about an uncomfortable situation between herself and a friend, Sarah. They had met up, and Sarah was complaining about a dress she had gotten that didn’t fit her anymore. Sarah mentioned that this dress was past the date of being eligible for a refund.

The Incident

The original poster (OP) validated Sarah’s annoyance that the dress didn’t fit. She mentioned how she thought the dress was cute and didn’t think it should go to waste. So, the OP offered to buy it from Sarah. A bit later, Sarah hosted a birthday party for her boyfriend, Sam. The OP was invited and thought it would be the perfect opportunity to wear her new dress. She reasoned that no one had seen her wear the new clothing, which was cheaper than purchasing a new dress for the birthday party.

The Dress

Before leaving for the event, the OP took some pictures with some of the other girls who would be attending the event, and Sarah ended up seeing them. She sent a message to the OP asking if she would not wear that dress to the event. Sarah confessed she had not purchased the dress from a shop and it was a gift from Sam. Sarah mentioned she didn’t want to tell him the gift didn’t fit. Sarah also revealed in the message that the dress was more expensive than initially led on and was from a specific designer. At this point, the OP was already traveling to the party, and it was too late to change, so she acted as if she hadn’t seen the message yet.

Party Time

The OP explains that after arriving at the birthday party, she was pulled aside by Sarah. Sarah had offered to get the OP a ride home to change. The OP refused, and Sarah expressed she wanted the OP to leave the party. The OP stayed at the party and interacted with Sam and Sarah later in the evening. Sam complimented the OP’s dress and mentioned he had purchased one just like it for Sarah for their anniversary. At that point, Sarah said she wasn’t feeling well and left the party. IN THE MORNING, the OP received a message from Sarah expressing her distaste for the OP’s decision and her lack of consideration.

Online Support

The majority of feedback does not support the OP. Many users agreed that the title of the OP’s post vs what happened in the actual situation was very misleading. They had indicated in the title that the OP had worn a dress that didn’t fit her friend. The issue was that the OP wore something the friend requested them to avoid wearing. One person said, “You wore clothes she specifically asked you not to wear to spare her from embarrassment. At the very least, you’re not this girl’s friend because a friend would have taken the time to change, not ignored the message.”

Others hinted at the OP’s intentions, with Sam saying, “To wear a dress to a party for a person that had a special significance for that dress and who had bought it for his girlfriend, her friend, indicates at best that OP wanted to show off a designer dress. This despite being requested by her now ex-friend.”

Being Up Front

Others, however, did have questions as to why Sarah wasn’t upfront in the beginning with Sam. “It can be hard to talk about if she’d gained a lot of weight quickly and struggled to accept it, especially if she thinks her boyfriend may view her differently or judge her. Even if she doesn’t think he’d consider her differently, putting that out into the universe is hard when you’re struggling to accept it internally,” someone guessed.

Another person pointed out, “Waiting until the literal last second when they’re already leaving to bring up that “whoops, my boyfriend will recognize and know that was supposed to be my dress” makes the “friend” the a-hole here. If there were strings attached, it needed to be disclosed when the dress was sold to OP.”


Overwhelmingly, most people side with Sarah on this issue, saying things like, “Help a sister out…go change! It’s better to make friends wait and be a little late than potentially ruin someone’s birthday party and create an issue in your friend’s relationship. It seems like you may have a different motive for wearing the dress, or you’re not Sarah’s friend. Friends don’t purposely throw each other under the bus.”

Inspired by this thread – photos for illustrative purposes only

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