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Everyone wants to feel appreciated on their birthday, and one way that people show their appreciation is through thoughtful and personal gifts. When one woman thinks her boyfriend’s gift is disappointing, she tells him so. But she is left questioning if what she said was too harsh and ungrateful.

Seeking Opinions

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So, she asks on a popular online forum, is she wrong for speaking up and being honest with her boyfriend about the birthday gift he gave her?

The Gift

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The OP (original poster) first lays out how important birthdays are to her. She expresses how much it means to her to feel loved on her birthday and how much she likes celebrating other people’s birthdays as well.

She Loves Birthdays

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“I really, really love birthdays. I always have. I love having cake, opening presents, feeling loved by my people, all of that birthday jazz. I really love celebrating other people’s birthdays, too,” says the OP.

She Puts a Lot of Time Into Finding Great Gifts

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The OP explains how she enjoys putting effort into the events when she is the one giving. However, the OP emphasizes that by effort, she does not mean money. She states, “I take a lot of time and energy (NOT necessarily money) to find great gifts for people.”

Feeling Stressed

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This year, when the OP’s birthday rolls around, she is especially excited. Due to tighter finances and a busy schedule, the OP is naturally more stressed than usual, so a day to feel appreciated and carefree is welcome.

Disappointment Ensues

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When her birthday arrives, the OP finds things don’t go how she would have liked. She says, “I understand that money is tight and that life happens quickly, but I was disappointed with my birthday gift this year.”

He Didn’t Have Much Money

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The OP continues, “He got me flowers, which was really sweet. However, that’s all I got. When I asked if he had more for me downstairs, he smiled and said no. His reasoning was that he didn’t have as much money this year as he had before and that he couldn’t figure out what to get me.”

Feelings Were Hurt

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The casualness of the gift takes the OP by surprise and hurts her feelings. She shares, “My response was that if he was at Kroger to buy me flowers, I couldn’t believe he didn’t see something there that reminded him of me, or he could’ve bought my favorite candy. Just SOMETHING.”

Lack of Effort

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The OP adds, “I was upset about the lack of effort, not the lack of monetary value.” At the end of it, no one seems to be very happy. The OP explains, “He hasn’t been acting the same since and has been kind of ignoring me, so I’ve been wondering if what I said made me an a**hole.”

Varied Responses

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The reactions from users of the forum the OP posted her question to were varied. However, the majority seemed to be on the OPs side, voting NTA (not the a**hole).

Hash it Out

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One comment says, “NTA because I really think you don’t care about the money but the thought. I would try to hash this out and explain what parts mean a lot to you. It’s the thoughtfulness, not the money.”

Love Don’t Cost a Thing

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Sharing similar thoughts, a second person adds, “NTA. Honestly, flowers are okay, but he could have easily written you a love letter or done something for you that doesn’t cost money or something.”

“NTA, it’s not about spending money. It’s about putting some effort in. Take her somewhere that has an amazing view to give her the flowers,” a third comment suggests.

Lack of Gratitude

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Some disagreed, though. One person says, “YTA (you’re the a**hole). By the way you tell the story, he gave you the flowers, and instead of saying thank you, you asked if there was more and then complained.”

Not Entitled

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“YTA. What you said was objectively rude and extremely ungrateful. You’re not entitled to gifts. Not everyone enjoys giving gifts, and not everyone is good at it either – if you want something specific, you should let it be known. Otherwise, just be thankful for what you have,” agrees a second user.

Her Entire Family is Angry With Her for Telling Her Sister She Was Adopted

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Families are beloved but undoubtedly complicated. Every family is different, and all of them come with unique challenges. One woman asks the internet to help her decide if she was wrong to tell her sister they were adopted. Her Entire Family is Angry With Her for Telling Her Sister She Was Adopted

He Caught His Son Pulling a Mean Prank on Someone and Punished Him Too Harshly

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Raising children is full of challenges. It’s hard work bringing up decent, balanced people. One of the most vital lessons is how to treat other people. One man wants to know, is he wrong for punishing his son for a prank? He Caught His Son Pulling a Mean Prank on Someone and Punished Him Too Harshly

She Wants To Hire a Sitter To Help When She’s Sick and Her Husband Won’t Get on Board

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A Reddit user shares her story of expecting her husband to give her some of his sick days so that she can take the day off. She Wants To Hire a Sitter To Help When She’s Sick and Her Husband Won’t Get on Board

Her Sister-in-Law Won’t Let Her Bring Her Newborn to Her Wedding, and She’s Furious

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Your wedding day is all about you and your partner—a day to celebrate your commitment to one another with your closest friends and family. Sometimes though, the vision for the day requires restrictions on the guest list. One woman asks a popular online forum if she’s an a**hole for not letting her sister-in-law bring her newborn to their wedding. Her Sister-in-Law Won’t Let Her Bring Her Newborn to Her Wedding, and She’s Furious

Her Husband Left Her and Their Kids, and Her Mom Won’t Let Them Move in With Her

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When our loved ones turn to us for support during trying times, we can find that we don’t always have the same idea of what “support” means. When one woman’s attempt to help isn’t well received, she asks on a popular online forum; is she the a**hole for getting her daughter an apartment? Her Husband Left Her and Their Kids, and Her Mom Won’t Let Them Move in With Her

Inspired by this thread – photos for illustrative purposes only.

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